Navigating Big Feelings With little Ones

Children experience emotions just as deeply as adults, but they often lack the words or tools to express them. As a result, feelings like anger, sadness, or frustration can sometimes come out in ways that feel overwhelming—for both children and parents. Supporting your child through these moments not only helps them feel safe but also builds their emotional intelligence for the future.

Why Big Feelings Happen

This prep school in London suggests that young children are still learning how to manage emotions. Their brains are developing rapidly, but self-regulation skills take time to grow. This means that strong emotions such as disappointment when a toy breaks, or frustration at having to share, can feel unbearable to them. Understanding that these responses are a normal part of development helps parents respond with empathy instead of frustration.

Creating a Safe Space for Emotions

One of the most powerful things you can do as a parent is to make your child feel that their emotions are valid. When your little one has a meltdown, rather than dismissing their feelings with “don’t be silly,” try acknowledging what they are going through. Phrases such as “I can see you’re upset because your block tower fell” can make children feel understood, even if the situation seems small from an adult perspective. This safe space builds trust and encourages children to talk about how they feel.

Teaching the Language of Feelings

Children often act out because they don’t yet have the words to express what’s going on inside. Introducing simple vocabulary for emotions—happy, sad, angry, worried—gives them the tools to communicate more clearly. As they grow, you can add more nuanced feelings like “disappointed” or “nervous.” Storybooks, games, and even role play are great ways to practise naming emotions in a fun and engaging way.

Calming Strategies That Work

Helping children find practical ways to manage their feelings is just as important as recognising them. Different strategies work for different personalities, but some effective approaches include:

• Breathing exercises – Ask them to blow out slowly as if they are cooling down a hot chocolate.
• Quiet corners – Create a calm space with soft cushions, books, or a favourite toy where they can retreat when overwhelmed.
• Movement – Sometimes, a burst of energy through running, dancing, or jumping can help release frustration.

Over time, these strategies become tools they can use independently.

Leading by Example

Children often mirror the behaviours they see in adults. If they watch you handle stress calmly—by taking deep breaths, talking about your emotions, or walking away for a moment—they are more likely to adopt those behaviours themselves. Being open about your own feelings, in an age-appropriate way, also shows them that it’s okay to experience a range of emotions.

Building Resilience for the Future

Navigating big feelings with little ones is not about eliminating difficult emotions, but about teaching children that all feelings are manageable. With patience, empathy, and consistent support, children learn to regulate themselves, communicate effectively, and bounce back from challenges. These are skills that will serve them not only in childhood, but throughout their lives.